Cultural Training, Part 1

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Monday, February 9^th

Today was our first day of cultural training.  It was a good time to take it, now that we have been here for a month and have some good questions to ask, like "Why do pedestrians not have the right-of-way?" and "What do I do when the older lady falls asleep on me in the subway?".  It was also the last day of Chinese New Year, so our trainer brought over a traditional food, which was a big salad.  It comes on a tray with all the ingredients separated (each one represents something), and then you mix the salad together with your chopsticks, tossing it as high as you can.  He kept encouraging us to “Toss the salad, toss the salad!” and I kept giggling – apparently the euphemism “tossing your salad” doesn’t have the same meaning here.

Some of the more interesting tidbits we picked up today:

1.)  History in a paragraph:  In the 13th century, the prince of Srivijaya names the island Singa-Pura, meaning "Lion City" even though lions have never existed on the island (he probably saw a tiger).  Skip ahead to 1819, Stamford Raffles arrives in Singapore to establish a trading post for the British East India Company.  February 15, 1942:  British Forces in Singapore surrender to the Imperial Japanese Army.  August 15, 1945:  Japan surrenders to the Allies.  May 1959:  Lee Kuan Yew becomes Singapore's first Prime Minister at the age of 36.  1963:  Malaya, Singapore, Sabah, and Sarawak merge and become Malaysia.  August 9th, 1965:  The Malaysian Parliment votes to expel Singapore from the Federation; Singapore becomes independant.

2.)  Singapore's Five Shared Values:  Nation before community and society before self;  Family as the basic unit of society;  Community support and respect for the individual;  Consensus, not conflict;  Racial and religious harmony.

These values exhibit themselves in some interesting ways.  In the support of family, the government hosts singles' cruises in order to help people meet and get married.  You also cannot live in government housing (as 85% of the population does) unless you are married.  Or over the age of 35.  They start to feel sorry for you at that time, I guess.

Racial Harmony:  75% of the population is of Chinese decent, 15% is Malaysian, 7% is Indian, and 3% is "Other".  All the government housing keeps this ratio.  If you're Malaysian and there is already 15% in the building, you'll have to find a different place to live.  This is supposed to prevent communities from completely segregating themselves from each other.  In addition, everyone gets a public holiday.  All Singaporeans get New Year's Day, Labour Day and National Day (August 9th); the Chinese get Chinese New Year; the Christians get Good Friday and Christmas Day; the Indians get Vesak Day and Deepavali; and the Muslims get Hari Raya Puasa and Hari Raya Haji.

Nation before community:  Every male has to spend two years in military service after high school.  Females don't have to go, which results in some interesting test scores in your freshman year of college.  Since the girls havent been away from school for two years, they tend to score much better than the guys who haven't studied in a while.

3.)  The National Flag:

Red symbolises universal brotherhood and equality of men; white, purity and virtue.  The crescent moon represents a young nation on the rise.  The five stars stand for democracy, peace, progress, justice and equality.

4.)  Confucianism still has a big influence in society here, including hierarchal system:  Soverign to subject, elder to younger sibling, parent to child, and husband to wife.  People are valued, but everyone is not the same.

5.)  Singapore is New Money, so outward appearance is very important, including wearing big labels (shoes, sunglasses, purses).  In addition, there are the Five C's of Singapore:  Credit Card (what color, ie. Black AmEx), Compensation (how much money you make), Club (which one you belong to), Car (if you own one and what kind it is), and Condominium (which one you live in).

6.)  Small Talk Taboos:  Being critical of Singapore, the "Malay-Subject", freedom of the press, sexuality, praising oneself, and the roles of different ethnic groups.  Acceptable Small Talk:  Compliments about Singapore, sports (as long as it's soccer, preferrably Manchester United or Liverpool), complaining, work, shopping, holiday trips, food/drink, education and money.

7.)  Non-Verbal Communications:  No body contact between members of the opposite sex, generally keep arm's length distance, don't pat children on the head, don't point at somebody with your forefinger, don't hit your right fist on your left palm, and don't wave somebody over with your palm up - use palm-down only.

Tomorrow is Cultural Training and Business Communications, or. "Don't Ever EVER Call Someone Out In A Group Meeting".

Try It, You'll Like It

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Sunday, February 8^th

David woke up with a cold, which isn’t good for anybody.  There’s lots of moaning and groaning, and apparently he was so weak with fatigue, he could barely get out a pathetic “…will you get me some juice…” once he was finally able to crawl downstairs.  This would be a good day for me to leave the house and run errands, I think.  We were supposed to bring Millie to Sentosa Beach for her first beach swim today, but she wasn’t feeling well either – her tummy was loud and grumbly, which is usually a sign of trouble.  Sure enough, I was unfortunate enough to see her stomach contents in the Bonsai Garden of the Singapore Botanical Gardens on our walk.  There was someone jogging by, so it was a little embarrassing.  If your dog throws up in a public garden, are you expected to clean it up, like poo?  I chose "no, just leave it and walk quickly away".  I just hope some little kid didn’t step in it on the way to see the cool little mini-trees.

I made my fourth trip to the grocery store in four days, in order to get the rest of the spices for a new local recipe I wanted to try.  There's a substantial Indian population here in Singapore, and I'm determined to learn how to cook some authentic Indian cuisine.  Plus it was vegetarian with lots of garlic and ginger and I figure I could tell David it's good for his cold.  I'm a terrible nurse, I have no sympathy and no patience with those who refuse to suck it up so I try to make up for it in other ways.  Cooking for him allows me to do something nice without actually having to pretend to feel sorry for him, instead of annoyed that he's forcing his misery on me.

I don't know if there are any foodies out there, but the dish was fantastic.  I thought I'd share.

Spiced Red Lentils

Serves 8 as a side dish or 4 as a main course

1/2 t ground coriander

1/2 t ground cumin

1/2 t ground cinnamon

1/2 t ground tumeric

1/8 t ground cardmom

1/8 t red pepper flakes

1 T vegetable oil

1 medium onion

4 medium garlic cloves, minced

1 1/2 t minced fresh ginger

4 cups water (or 3 cups water and 1 cup coconut milk)

1 1/4 cups red lentils, rinsed and picked over

1 pound plum tomatoes, cored, seeded nd chopped medium

1/2 cup minced fresh cliantro leaves

2 T unsalted butter

Salt and ground black pepper

1.)  Combine the spices in a small bowl and set aside.  Heat the oil in a large saucepan over medium-high heat until shimmering.  Add the spices and saute until fragrant, about 10 seconds.  Stir in the onion and cook until softened, 5 to 7 minutes.  Stir in the garlic and ginger and cook until fragrant, about 30 seconds.

2.)  Stir in the water and lentils and bring to a boil.  Reduce to a simmer and cook, uncovered, until the lentils are tender and resemble a coarse puree, 20 to 25 minutes.  (At this point, the lentils can be regrigerated in an airtight container for up to 2 days; reheat over medium-low before continuing.)

3.)  Stir in the tomatoes, cilantro, and butter and season with salt and pepper to taste before serving.

It Separates the Boys from the Girls

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Saturday, February 6^th

Thank goodness for the purchase of the Apple TV last summer.  I actually didn’t think we’d really use it any more than we did at home (not much), because I was assured my favorite entertainment was also available in Singapore.  David had said, “Don’t worry, people there watch the same dumb shows you do”.  But he was mis-informed.  There are NOT the same shows here, only American Idol is “live”, all other shows are at least a season behind.  But with the Apple TV and iTunes, it only costs about $25 a season for any one show, a small price to pay to keep up with America’s Next Top Model and Chuck.  I have stopped watching some shows, finding they are just not worth my hard-earned cash.  Put a price on something, I suppose, and it makes you pick your priorities.  (This season of Desparate Housewives is just not worth it.)  But it has initiated some new money conversations between the two of us:  "You actually bought this show?"  "Well, at least it's better than Fringe."  "Hey, that show is good, you just don't get it since you never saw the first couple of episodes."  "No, I don't watch it because it silly."  "Right, you only watch smart shows like Gossip Girl."  "Touche."

Today David was able to talk me into meeting him after yoga, and we went to Thai Express again for dinner.  He asked for the spiciest dish they had, and was rewarded with Fiery Noodles.  I asked if it was really that hot, and he said, “I guess it’s pretty uncomfortable”.  Looks like we might have a winner!  He also had a Sour Plum drink, having been sold by the tag line:  “It Separates the Boys from the Girls”.  We couldn't agree if this was an actual saying here, or if they just got it a little wrong.  There are so many things that acutally separate the two, how sour did this drink really have to be?  Not very, it turned out.  At least we have our TV shows to separate us.

Lazy, Spoiled, or Lucky?

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Thursday, February 4^th

I started to learn to garden last year, and I love it.  Here, however, I have no idea what any of our plants are, and our hedges are a good 30 feet high and seem to grow at least a foot a week.  So we now have a gardener.  His name is Ho Ping, which I find amusing but I’m not sure quite why.  He swoops in with his troop, and they trim, water, “mow” (there is almost no grass) and spray for ants all in about 30 minutes and are gone.  Basically I hide inside, feeling guilty about not helping.  But whenever I step outside they seem to think something is wrong, so I sit with Millie, trying to get her to stop barking at the strangers in her yard.  Next time, I will at least pick up the dog poo before they arrive, it’s the least I can do to feel like I deserve this luxury.

         

Fish Heads, Fish Heads, Eat 'Em Up Yum!

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Wednesday, February 4^th

It was a pretty uneventful day, except for dinner.   We ate at a place called Samy’s Curry, described as “comfort food” by a local.  Banana leaf placemats, fish head soup, and the best butter nan (indian bread) I’d had since I’d been to India.  The moment was duly captured.

Cleanup in Aisle 7

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Tuesday, February 3^rd

I am officially connected.  I have Ovoo.  I have Windows Live Messenger.  I have Yahoo Voice.  I have Skype.  I have Office Communicator.  If anyone wants to get a hold of me, they can.  Except my parents.  They still have dial-up.

Completely unrelated, grocery shopping has to be one of the most stressful experiences I’ve had here.  I don’t like it even back in the US, but here, it takes the stress to a whole different level.  I had been to the grocery store the day before, and I was almost brought to tears in the store.  (Have you ever been faced with an entire aisle of soy sauce and tried to decide which one to buy, all along knowing your $12 crappy ice cream was melting?  That and the $300 bill for ½ cart of food just about pushed me over the edge.)  Today, I was determined to find the four items I was unable to find yesterday:  Thai basil, limes, vegetable oil, and dishwasher detergent.  Was Thai basil the same as basil here, just like cilantro is called Chinese parsley?  Why can I not find limes for gods’ sakes?  For lack of vegetable oil, do I buy corn oil?  Sunflower oil?  Canola oil?  Am I the only person in Singapore who owns a dishwasher and needs dishwasher detergent?  The answers:  No, basil is just basil here – if I want Thai basil I have to grow my own.  Limes are these tiny marble-sized ones, looks like I’ll need to modify the recipe.  I settled for canola oil.  Yes, I am among the 1% of people here who do not have a Helper to do my dishes, and will have to try somewhere else for dishwasher detergent.

Jeezum crow, I’m exhausted.  Frozen pizza for dinner tonight.  And a dishwasher that will sit idle for another day.

Singapore Superbowl

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Monday, February 2^nd

Superbowl XLIII was broadcast live here in Singapore at 7:30am.  We heard through the American Grapevine that there was a bar called Bojangles (“Where everyone here is the same color”) that was showing the game on their big screen, and was hosting a Western-style breakfast to boot.  [Read:  sausage and eggs, instead of the traditional noodles.]

We jumped at the chance at the normalcy of watching a big game in a bar, and headed out in the early AM.  It turned out to be a pretty good time, and we even won $100 just before halftime playing Squares!  But… there were no commercials broadcast.  Not a single one.  Seriously, we all know that’s the best part.  After getting over the disappointment of this, we settled in to our pancakes and starting watching the crowd.  There was a family of Steelers fans there, but they were vastly outnumbered by the people who wanted to see Arizona finally win something.  

We were rooting for Arizona, and I had prepared a response in case anybody asked me why:

 “I’m a Denny Green fan.” 

I even practiced the dead-pan face.  No one asked, though, darn it, so I never found out if anyone thought it was funny.  Being it was during the day, the bar staff kept having to tape more and more plastic garbage bags to the windows to cut the daytime glare from the screen.

The most entertaining part for me was meeting some of the kids from the nearby American School.  It was a Monday, so they did have school that day, but since the American School follows US holidays, this counted as a valid excuse to skip classes in the morning.  The group dynamic for them was the same as everywhere else – the boys completely engrossed in the game, and all the girls texting the boys the entire time trying to get their attention.  The guys completely Did Not Care.  It was the Superbowl.  Please.

And Boom Goes the Dynamite

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Monday, February 1^st

David loves ESPN.

I take that back.  He more than loves it.  He lives for it.  It nourishes him.  Back in MN, every morning I would wake up to the theme song, “Da ner na, da ner na” and every night, I would go to bed to the same, “Da ner na, da ner na.”  Here in Singapore, they do have ESPN, but of course it’s not the same.  There is no Chris Berman talking about how Dick Trickle did in his last race.  There is no “Winner winner chicken dinner!” following football highlights, or "Boom goes the dynamite!" following college basketball highlights.  Oh, there are highlights, all right, but they are either of soccer, table tennis, rugby, or cricket.  Not that these are not valid sports, it’s just not the same.  I am not a Manchester United fan, I do not care that Ronaldo might be traded.  Or that in cricket South Africa beat Austrailia 177 to 34.  You know what else is on constantly?  Cross country skiing!  And biathalon!  I’m as die-hard XC skier as any, but seeing all that great snow for me is simply just teasing, and almost just as depressing as seeing that seeing that only cricket is on for the next 4 hours.

Our second cable upgrade was to get the HD channels, of which there are a total of five.  No, ESPN is not one of them, but there is a new channel here called All Sports Network (ASN).  And you know what was on when we were finally able to get the channel this afternoon?  Big Ten Network and the Gophers men’s basketball game!  A replay, but still!  And then we watched the Florida vs. Oklahoma football game!  Ah, the sweet sounds of home…

David slept with a smile on his face for the first time in a month…

Wanna Be Snobbery

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Sunday, January 31st

No one has asked me yet where the name “wannabesnobbery” has come from, but I guess I’ll explain anyway…

I had a good friend, Abbie, who I met back in college at the University of MN.  (She’s also the reason that David and I met, but that’s a story for another day.)  She moved away to become a ski instructor in Vail after college graduation, having no idea what else to do.  She was telling me stories about waitressing in Vail in the off-season, and when it was really slow, they wait staff were able to sit at the bar and taste all the wines.  (In order to better be able to recommend them to the customers, I think the excuse was.)  I asked her if she was going to become a wine snob now, and she replied, “I wanna be!” with such unashamed enthusiasm I was inspired.  She was a ski bum, sharing an apartment with four other instructors and making next to nothing, but she wasn’t going to let that stop her from trying to learn to appreciate wine.

What’s a Wanna-Be-Snob?  Someone who’s last meal would a Totino’s Party Pizza, Diet Coke and Snickers Ice Cream bar, but who is still trying to learn to cook rack of lamb.  Someone who is beside herself with excitement when Legally Blonde comes on TV, but still tries to see all the Oscar-nominated short films just know what they are.  Someone who deep down prefers People magazine, but has still read all the Pulitzer prize-winning novels from the last ten years.  Just because even though she’s not, she really does want to be that sort of person.

I have another friend, Lola, who has inspired me to try and buy art.  She once said [in the most charming southern drawl], “Even if we have no money, I continue to buy art… I consider it a worthy investment.”  [Also insert her husband’s snort of exasperation here... “Trust me, she does…”.]  I’ve always wanted to be the sort of person who owns artsy stuff.  Unfortunately I was not born with an eye for such things, and still consider stuffed animals from childhood valid decoration. 

In Singapore, there are a lot of ex-pats moving in and out every month.  I’m not sure about other companies’ packages, but with ours you get to bring in one shipping container of stuff, but not a whole lot more back to the US than you came with.  (For example, they’ll pay for one container on the way over, but not two on the way back.)  And since there’s a lot of traveling and shopping to be done in Southeast Asia, I’m sure when it comes time to pack up on the way home you start to realize just how much stuff you’ve collected over the last 2-3 years.  Enter… The Ex-Pat Yard Sale.  Us newbie ex-pats are able to get incredible deals on things that other people either can’t use back in the home country like electronics, or simply don’t have room for in that container.  And boy did I score on a sale today!  The person having the yard sale used to run an art gallery for Dutch artists.  I went, thinking that maybe I could afford maybe one piece.  I bought nine.

You know how much all this cost total?  $150.  But don’t tell.  I want people to think I’m an art snob.

Smog and Hairspray

Sorry for the lack of posts lately, I'm in Korea for the week with David and all my pictures are back on my home computer. I'm still writing the back-dated entries, though, so tune back in after March 7th to read a slew of new-old entries. Until then, I'll leave you with a picture of beautiful and crowded Seoul, South Korea...




My biggest surprise it that's it's been as hilly as San Francisco. There are streets almost too steep to even walk up, though I probably could use the workout after eating all this great food. But then there's the smog. I have a great view from my hotel room and there's a thick yellow haze that keeps me from having a view of the mountains. It makes me not want to gulp too much air lest my lungs turn that color.

The next surprise is how dressed up everyone is all the time. Even the taxi drivers wear ties. Good thing I brought more than sweats on this trip, otherwise I wouldn't be able to go out in public for more than to find street food. Koreans look like a million bucks, especially the ladies - skirts, dress coats, heels, and perfect make-up everywhere you look. What time do they get up in the morning to look like that!? It's inspiring and exhausting at the same time.

Well, I must go, I'm going out to dinner in three hours and I need time to get ready...